Trump Gifts For Your Friends Struggling To Cope With His Campaign

Make no mistake: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liar, rampant xenophobe, racist, misogynist and birther.

But give the man credit: He is (unintentionally) making American political memorabilia great again.

There are Trump wigs, Trump masks, and, appropriately, Trump dog poop bags. You can get Trump socks that, unlike the candidate, have realistic hair. There are even Trump bobblehead dolls that express his racism in two different ways.

Regardless of your personal preferences, this stuff is all classier than a “Make America Great Again” baseball cap.

  • Really Unflattering Donald Trump Mask

  • Donald Trump Dog Poop Bag

    DonaldTrumpDogPoopBags.com

    It’s hard to tell what holds more crap: Donald Trump or this Trump-themed dog poop bag. Let’s call it a draw, but we prefer the bag since we’ll be able to get rid of it before November. ($4.99, DonaldTrumpDogPoopBags.com)
  • Trump Bobbleheads

    TrumpBobblehead.com

    Usually, bobblehead dolls have big heads over tiny bodies. The problem with making a Trump bobblehead doll is that no one is as big-headed as “The Donald.” No matter what they do, the head will never be bigger than the real Trump’s noggin. ($24.95 each, $39.95 for pair)
  • Donald Trump Whoopie Cushion

    Gas-Bags.com/

    This functions like a normal whoopie cushion, but it’s actually called a Donald Trump Gas Bag, because we’re not saying “whoopie” at any aspect of Trump’s candidacy. ($9.99, gas-bags.com/
  • Creepy Donald Trump Mask

    Fun.com

  • Donald Trump Cornhole Game

    VictoryTailgate.com

    The fact that Trump seems to have a hole in his head is definitely a detriment to higher office, but it’s a “yuge” advantage for Cornhole. ($169.99, VictoryTailgate.com)
  • Comb Over Trump Wig

    It’s sad enough that people believe anything Trump says — especially when he insists his hair is real. You won’t have that option when you wear this Trump Comb Over Wig, but you have something better: When the party’s over, you can get rid of the wig. When the Republican party collapses, they still won’t be able to get rid of Trump. ($16.99, SpiritHalloween.com)
  • Donald Trump Jar Of Horrors

    LittleJarsOfHorror.com

    Some people would like Trump’s head on a silver platter. Would you settle for a jar? This decorative jar makes it look like you have a life size Trump head sitting on your desk. Since many people think he’s lost his head, ($25, LittleJarsOfHorror.com)
  • Trump Socks With Hair Flip

    GumballPoodle.com

    Can’t decide whether to flip off Donald Trump or sock him? These socks that come with actual hair on Trump’s head (unlike the real Donald) should satisfy both urges. Don’t wash your feet before you put them on. ($30, GumballPoodle.com)
  • Trump Coloring Book

    Whether you color yourself red or blue, the Trump Coloring Book is a good way to pass the time between inflammatory Trump tweets. One downside: Trump’s bizarre skin tone will make you use every shade of orange crayon. ($9.30, Overstock.com)
  • Not Completely Horrible-Looking Trump Mask

    As Trump masks go, this one captures the smug pucker of his lips and his rubbery skin tone. However, the hair is too flattering and looks more genuine than the locks belonging to “The Donald” himself. ($21.99, SpiritHalloween.com)
  • Donald Trump Hell Toupee

  • Donald Trump Watch

    RevolutionWatch.com

    This Trump-themed watch is like Trump in some ways and unlike him in others. Yes, it gets wound up a lot, but, unlike Trump, it’s right more than two times a day. ($34.95, RevolutionWatch.com)

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